Homebodies - Neither a borrower or lender be…

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Rita Friesen
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It’s this book I’m reading that started this train of thought. Still from ‘Roughing it in the Bush’ by Susanna Moodie, published in 1852, “Those who go a-borrowing, go a-sorrowing.

I verily believe that a demon of mischief presides over borrowed goods, and takes a wicked pleasure in playing off a thousand malicious pranks upon you the moment he enters your dwelling.” Now the examples she cites are not ones with which most of us can identify. Personally, I have never borrowed a horse. Moodie maintains that the horse with the best reputation for docility and obedience, once lent to another, becomes a destructive dervish, destroying carriage and all that it carried. Nor have I borrowed dishes, but I am assured that dishes that have lasted generations in the hands of the caring family, fly off tables and shatter when lent to someone. I think Ann of Green Gables would agree. Neither does Moodie recommend the lending of clothing for it is unlikely that the article will return in the pristine condition in which it began. That one I know. “But of all the evils, to borrow money is perhaps the worst. If of a friend, he ceases to be one the moment you feel that you are bound to him by the heavy clog of obligation.”

That quote has many backers!

* Polonius, a character in William Shakespeare’s Hamlet is giving advice to Laertes. “Neither a borrower nor a lender be; For loan oft loses both itself and friend, and borrowing dulls the edge of husbandry.”...

*Before borrowing money from a friend, decide which you need most. American Proverb.

These are age old adages, perhaps one of the reasons so many of our early settlers encouraged work bees. Come and help, bring your own axe, or saw, or whatever tool the task requires. My father would on occasion lend a farm implement to a neighbour and he usually picked up the repair bill. To be fair, more than once some item he had borrowed needed repairs as well. Then, of course, the item had been weak when it arrived! Nope, if at all possible, refrain from borrowing or lending, anything.

Where this all falls apart for me is when it comes to books.  “Never lend books, for no one ever returns them; the only books I have in my library are books that other folks have lent me.” ― Anatole France. Not quite, but almost! Even when my name is clearly written on the inside cover, some have never found their way home. It was a tad unsettling, when I was actively downsizing, how many books had someone else’s name clearly written on the inside cover. There were some books that were welcomed joyously on their return, and others had been long forgotten. When I was a young child, we cousins had access to Aunt Nora’s supply of books. Signed out, and then sought out if necessary. One way of tracking precious friends.