Column like I see 'em - You’re grounded, Manitoba! Now go to your room!


By Eoin Devereux

Neepawa Banner & Press

Over the past month, things have really gone sideways on us here in Manitoba with regard to the COVID-19 numbers, especially in Winnipeg. When the city shifted into a restricted (Orange) level on Sept. 28, and should have seen the case numbers skewer downward, or at least hold steady. But that’s not what has happened. They have trended upward, at an alarming pace and now Winnipeg finds itself in code red.

So now here we are, sitting at the cusp of a provincial curfew. Being potentially treated like some type of petulant teen, because some people, either due to ignorance or arrogance,  are missing the message. If you don’t want a curfew, wear a mask, keep your distance and wash your hands. But, apparently those three things are too hard for some, so here we are, about to be sent to our rooms without any supper.

Dumb and dangerous

A part of me is very frustrated and just wants to place the blame upon Winnipeggers, because the fact is, we’re all dealing with these new restrictions because of what’s going on in River City. Over a seven day average (Oct. 27 to Nov. 2), Winnipeg comprised 67.4 per cent of all new COVID cases in the province. It would be so easy to lay some blanket blame on Winnipeg, but that’s not the reality of the situation.

The fact is, there is a large contingent of people in Winnipeg that are “following the fundamentals”, but there is still a good five to seven per cent of the entire population who are just complete mouth-breathing morons.

In a small town, such as ours, it’s a little easier to miss out on them...unless you work in retail or at a convenience store. If that’s the case, you likely see them every day, coming in to buy smokes and scratchers.

I estimate that within Neepawa, we likely have between 240 to 322 morons, an amount small enough to not be all that disruptive. In Winnipeg, however, those numbers equal out to between 38,000 to 53,000; a number significant enough to do some real damage.

Now please don’t think that I am targeting or insinuating that those who don’t have so called proper education, are the morons in question. Some of the smartest, most educated people you know are likely morons. We all have our moronic moments.

Now, if only we had people who went to school for most of their lives, then worked in this field and had first hand knowledge of the situation so we could get factual information, advice and leadership, allowing us to make informed decisions to help us all survive this situation...oh wait!?!

Not listening to these people, that’s moronic.

There are still people who just don’t seem to get that we live in a society, and that means, sometimes you pull together and sacrifice for the common good. But there is a bit of an unwillingness to suffer a little now (wearing masks, no gathering, etc.) to avoid a much greater suffering later (overwhelmed hospitals and a lockdown).

Folks, that mindset is not only unwise…It’s downright moronic.

And another thing...

As of late, every time I watch Manitoba’s chief public health officer, Dr. Brent Roussin, during a COVID-19 briefing, I’m just waiting for the moment when he finally snaps. Just look at that small bulging vein along the side of his head every time he has to repeat the phrase “follow the fundamentals”. This is a man who is ready to lose his ever lovin’ mind on all of us…and we probably deserve it.

One of these days, he’s simply going to grab the microphone at one of these pressers, stare right down the middle of the camera lens and say, in an almost frighteningly calm, but psychotic tone. ‘Look you #&%!@?$ morons! I’ve tried explaining the science to you, I’ve tried reasoning with you. I’ve treated you like RATIONAL HUMAN BEINGS!...But you still don’t get it! Now quit making the selfish and stupid choices! Stay home while sick, socially distance and wear a friggin mask!”

Or perhaps I am merely projecting here.

Disclaimer: Column like I see ‘em is a monthly opinion column for the Neepawa Banner & Press. The views expressed are the writer’s and are not to be taken as being the view of the Banner & Press.